She's like Twilight, in-between day and night

vampireaurelia @ 2007-10-09T13:10:00

2007-10-09T17:15:32Z

I don't know where my head is anymore. There are so many days I think I have my entire agenda down to a tee. This class from this time to that time, work on this project from here to here, do this homework when you get back from this club and you'll still have plenty of time to work on that graphics assignment before you go to bed!

I think I'm too bogged down for my own good. I feel like I'm just spinning in circles and going absolutely no where. I need to drop a project. I need to stop killing myself over other people's mistakes, or what they do or don't do, or whateverthefuckexcuseyouwanttoaddhere. I can't even form coherent sentences because I feel so lost and dazed and frustrated. I don't care anymore. I need my life in order before I start worrying about you.

On hiatus. From everything. Until further notice. It's been a long time coming, and I think I need it now more than ever.

vampireaurelia @ 2007-10-02T12:22:00

2007-10-02T16:58:03Z

Each day that passes by I lose more and more faith in both Hanson and Hanson fans. Seriously, taking a break from the fandom for a while.

I don't know where I'm at with the novel count, but you can add The Awakening by Kate Chopin, The Italian by Ann Radcliff, and The Monk by Matthew Gregory Lewis.

That is all.

Novel Number Seventeen...

2007-07-28T20:32:07Z

...is completed. The Castle of Otranto by Horace Walpole.

I like the concept. A cursed family/castle. Misfortune ensues. Supernatural events. But it was just plain difficult for me to get into this novel.

But I had to read it for my Gothic Novel class. So I have two out of nine novels read for that one at least.

I've been killing myself at work lately, so I don't have much I want to add at this moment. I'm going to pass out on the couch.

Novels Fifteen and Sixteen...

2007-07-24T10:43:43Z

...are completed. The Encyclopedia of Dragons by some snarky Australian man whose name I forget because Dan returned the book to the library, and Coraline by Neil Gaiman. The first Dan had me read because he enjoyed it when he first read it [actually, I had him read it to me when he slept over the other night], and the second I had read in high school, finally found my own copy of it, and decided to read as a refresher because it is a short novel. A children's novel, actually, but pretty damn freaky, if you ask me.

But now I have to run to work. Then the doctor's. Then back to work. Oi.

Novel Number Fourteen...

2007-07-18T22:40:00Z

...is completed. Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas: A Savage Journey to the Heart of the American Dream.

I've been trying to get ahead of next semester, so I'm reading novels off my list for the Gothic Novel Seminar. Fear and Loathing is actually the last novel on the list that Dr. Anthony sent me. I was planning on starting in chronological order, but its harder for me to get into older novels [like The Castle of Otranto and The House of the Seven Gables] than it is with more contemporary literature [1971 is not necessarily contemporary now a days, but it sure is damn close].

I have mixed feelings about this novel. It was a fast read [2.5 days to complete]. Great exposition on the drug culture of the late sixties/early seventies. And I can sort of see why Dr. Anthony categorized it as "gothic," with its excessive drug use and themes of "paranoia" brought on by said drug usage. I think what threw me was the lack of a definitive plot, but I guess that adds to the overall feel of the novel. It's almost like you're experiencing drug-induced psychosis along with the protagonists.

I may have to rent the movie now.

I never update this thing anymore with what's going on in my life. If I had the time tonight, I would, but I'm going to see Transformers with Candy Bar tonight, and I need to get ready. Plus, I'm starting to get burned out with work and various side projects, so anything I would have to say about life in general would not appear coherent. Much like this paragraph. Must stop rambling. Oi. G'night.

Novel Number Thirteen...

2007-07-12T01:41:05Z

...completed. Exile by R.A. Salvatore.

This novel took longer to read than I both expected and hoped. Besides being insanely busy with work and such, the second installment of The Dark Elf Trilogy failed to captivate me as much as the first. Once again, I adore the character of Drizzt, and even applaud Salvatore for creating a host of memorble characters.

But I felt that this novel was rushed. Like the majority of it was written in haste, and jam packed with small filler scenarios to make it appear more voluptuous. I don't feel the character of Clacker was necessary at all. Neither were 90% of the battles in the novel, because we all knew that Drizzt and Belwar would emerge triumphant with barely a scratch. Our hero(s) being impervious to harm is good and all (hooray for continued series), that whole invincible team bit got old after fighting the goblins. And predictable. Shake it up a bit, Salvatore! They have to get more than just a knicked shoulder and a bump on the head.

And don't get me started on the grammatical errors. I bought the collector's edition. I found more than a dozen errors between the first two installments. What is even sadder is that this is not even the first print of this edition. The first one was published in 1998, and the second in 2000. You would think in that time these very simple errors would get polished.

Of course, I'll still read the rest of the trilogy, and quite possibly The Icewind Dale Trilogy, since that is also sitting in my bookshelf. But all of my novels for the Gothic novel seminar finally came in the mail (two weeks and $95 later), so Drizzt and his adventures are on hiatus until I read at least three of the Gothic novel texts. I'm trying to stay ahead of the work, because the last two semesters I got swamped with papers and readings because of how many English courses I took.

In other news, Candy and I took a road trip yesterday, and had an amazing time, even though we ended up blowing a big wad of hard earned cash in the process. Maybe I'll post pictures, who knows? Other issues are better left unsaid at the moment. More appropriate for a private journal, as opposed to this mock journal that's broadcasted throughout the entire Internet.

And now, I'm off to find my Lovie so he can take me home. I have work at 5am for the rest of the week, and I also have to clean both my room and my uncle's house. I'm exhausted.

Because Kenny G told me they count....

2007-07-07T08:45:42Z

Novels eleven and tweleve are completed. Exile and Sojourn, in their graphic novel form, are completed. The real Exile is exactly 101 pages away from completion, but I may have to put it on hiatus for a while while I read some of these novels for Dr. Anthony's class this coming semester (nine novels, sheesh!). I'm reading the shortest ones.

In other news, I've had an ear infection since Saturday, exactly one week ago, and it hurts like a mother fucker. I am not happy.

But I have to go to work now (which I would prefer to stay home, because of my throbbing ear), but since I took Sunday off because of the effin' ear, I have to go this week. Ray also quit, so I also have to cover his shift (5am-10am) Tuesday-Friday until someone else is found. I'm not sure how I feel about that yet.

I think I need to take a vacation. Once everyone else is done with theirs, I'm going to take one for myself. I probably won't go farther than Dan's house, but it'll be enough.

Peace out, cub scouts.

"The parry is wrong!" [or Novel Number Ten]

2007-06-29T21:56:16Z

Completed. Homeland by R.A. Salvatore.

This one I read either freshman or sophomore year of highschool, but since I bought the entire Dark Elf Trilogy, I decided to read it as a refresher.

There are only two things I want to say about this book [because I have other things to do today and don't want to spend all night writing a complicated livejournal entry]:

1) Drizzt Do'Urden is god. Possibly one of the sexiest characters in the sci-fi/fantasy genre. I wish the covers of the novels would depict him as such, instead of as a crotchy, wrinkled drow. He's still young. Make him as such. The end.

2) As much as I love the character of Drizzt, I found some aspects of Mr. Salvatore's writing style, mainly his repetition of battle cliches and his inability to have faith that his readers can deduce plots on their own. Seriously, I think I counted the phrase "ball of fury" at least twelve times, several of which were in the same battle scequence. Also, he just outright tells you everything. A character will say something or pick up an object, and before the reader can make a connection on his or her own, the author outlines the significance of the event in detail not even five sentences later.

For example, when Masoj was plotting to use Guenhwyvar to assassinate Drizzt. Masoj, while stroking the onyx figurine of the panther, would say something along the lines of, "The favored secondboy's death will come from where he least expects it!" Then Salvatore would add, rather bluntly, "Masoj planned to use Guenhwyvar to kill Drizzt."

But I will deal, because I adore Drizzt.

Novel Number Nine...

2007-06-22T23:55:50Z

...completed. Brave New World by Aldous Huxley.

This was another novel I was supposed to read for high school, but didn't. However, I wasn't prompted by personal interest this time, as I was with Beowulf. Candy's brother asked to borrow my copy for his summer reading list...I got frustrated with Sir Gawain, because the translation is quite confusing...and since I had it out, I picked it up and started reading. I actually finished it Thursday evening, but I was called into work for the past two days, so I didn't get a chance to write about it [or choose the next novel to read]. Enjoyed it. In fact, that was the fastest I've ever read any novel.

I haven't decided what I'm going to read next. Whether I'm going to finished Sir Gawain or Fanny Hill, or if I'm going to go into a completly different direction. I always mention a novel I'm going to read, then read something different anyway.

Novel Number Eight [and other assorted goodies]

2007-06-16T18:34:49Z

Novel Number Eight: ...is completed. The Dubliners by James Joyce. What mostly prompted me to pick up this novel was Dr. Farrell's work with the James Joyce Quarterly back when she lived in Tulsa, Oklahoma. She mentioned him all the time in Business Writing, and again in Brit Lit, so I finally decided to get something by him to see what he was like. I heard Finnegan's Wake was hell to get through, so I opted for this early collection of short stories.

One reason why I liked the stories so much was because they were about ordinary people carrying on with their ordinary lives. The characters were realistic, which made it easier to connect to them. People at funerals, at work, at home, having affairs, drinking...it wasn't sugar coated or euphemisized beyond recognition (although, I had to look up some of the Irish slang).

Then there was Joyce's ambiguous stance on Christianity. I'm sure that he, himself, was Catholic, but, as you know, Ireland is notorious for the Catholic-Protestant conflict. Part of Joyce's problem with Christianity was its intense focus on guilt, and that comes across in many of the stories. The first one in particular sets the priest up to be a very shady character.

But blast Joyce and his vague pronouns! The novel was short (just shy of 200 pages), so I probably could have finished it in two days maximum. But I had to reread so many stories because I couldn't figure out to whom Joyce was referring. Which I found out was typical Joyce. Silly Modernist.

I think one day I'll tackle Finnegan's Wake.

Why English Majors Are Not Allowed in Barnes and Noble: I spent $40 in Barnes and Noble yesterday. I bought three books: Sir Gawain and the Green Knight, The Languages of Middle Earth, and The Dark Elf Triology. I am a horrible person.

To Do List: Because if I don't write it, I won't get it done.
1) Finish essay for CABC Scholarship.
2) Mail out Nykii's packet [it's finished, I swear! I just have to take it to the post office to figure out the postage!].
3) Work on my novel, hardcore.
4) Organize book shelf.
5) Organize music collection.
6) Nag Tom for directions.
7) Find out work schedule from uncle.
8) Check to see if my financial aid is reapproved.

Paintball tomorrow :D

vampireaurelia @ 2007-06-09T20:56:00

2007-06-10T01:09:19Z

Sometimes you can just tell when you're going to have a bad day. Today was one of them. I was excited about getting to sleep in today (since I was offered the afternoon shift at the bakery), but alas, I was awoken at 5:00 to my air conditioner making annoying buzzing and clanking sounds. I checked to make sure nothing was shorting out, fiddled around with it, and, upon seeing no signs of sure destruction, attempted to go back to sleep.

My alarm went off at 6:00 so I could take a shower, but someone was already in there, so I decided to wait for my second alarm and went back to bed. When 6:30 rolled around and my second alarm buzzed, I once again could not take a shower because someone was in there. So I ended up falling back to sleep until 7:15, which wouldn't be all that bad if I didn't have to leave the house at 7:30 to walk to work on time. So my morning routine was rushed, but thankfully I did arrive on time.

At work, however, I was plagued by bad tips, aggrivated customers, and I slammed my finger in the cooler door. Luckily for my finger, the googly-eye ring that Dan gave me (our "engagement" ring) caught the brunt of the force and shattered. Unlucky because that is the second piece of jewelry given to me by Dan that broke (the Tiffany's bracelet is also in disrepair, and on its way to get fixed on Monday). After about an hour search (because, yes, I know it's just a plastic ring probably worth about a nickle, but it means something to me), I managed to find all the missing pieces scattered around the oven room. I spent most of the day super glueing it back together. Tom told me it would never work, but after three hours of surgery, my ring is back in one piece, albeit slightly distorted and more fragile.

Then when I come home after a little outing with Sierra (which was mucho fun), I get a letter in the mail from Wilkes University saying that all of my financial aid has been rejected, and not stating a reason. I am seriously banking on the fact that the registrar fucked something up (it wouldn't be the first time). Unfortunately I can't find out until Monday. Mother fuckers.

So instead of working on my novel like I wanted to, I have to hard core apply for scholarships and financial aid. Possibly look for another job over the summer with Dan to be able to pay off my tuition.

Fuckin'-A.

EDIT: Ken called me on Sunday. Happy now, bitch? :P

Like Liberation.

2007-06-08T04:15:21Z

I have a novel in the works. I wrote 1300 words of it tonight, which roughly translates to four and a half pages of text double spaced. I don't want to reveal the premise of the novel just yet, but it was a topic I was mulling over for a while now, and finally felt comfortable writing. I don't know if I'll ever publish it, but it was something I had to write for myself. I needed closure.

And now, off to bed, because I am super exhausted.

Novel Number Seven

2007-06-05T20:18:51Z

...completed. Jurassic Park by Michael Crichton.

Will write more later when I have some free time.

EDIT:

Just copying this from the email I just sent Dr. Farrell. Also simultaneously responding to Candy's comment because I have to head back to work in a half hour

I just finished up Jurassic Park on Monday night (much to my boyfriend's dismay; he bought it for me to make me hate the movie, and has failed to achieve his goal, haha). I enjoyed it, but Michael Crichton cannot write children for beans. I'm sorry, Mr. Crichton, not every child is a friggin' super genius; stop writing them as such. Six-year-olds still eat their own boogers, not save the world from complete dino-domination. I admit, the book had better action sequences (raptor migration on the Costa Rican mainland? Heck yes!), but the movie provided much more enjoyable characters. Dr. Malcolm is not a coward, Mr. Crichton, especially when he is played by someone as completely bad ass as Jeff Goldblum.

Novel Number Six...

2007-05-31T01:22:16Z

...completed. Beowulf: A Verse Translation by Seamus Heaney.

I initially read excerpts of Beowulf in high school senior year, back when I originally didn't think I would seriously follow English as a serious career choice. I didn't quite grasp the epic back then because I was still in that mode of, "Seton Catholic doesn't have the right to tell me what I should read, therefore, I will read whatever I want on the side and rebel." It's the same logic I used for Shakespeare (which is why I have at least ten Shakespeare plays sitting in my bookshelf but have yet to touch them). I even took the easy way out when it came to the projects surrounding the epic: I drew a detailed picture of Grendel, instead of the other kids, who wrote their own poems or directed their own movies based on the epic. I just didn't appreciate Beowulf back then. I don't even think I read past the fight with Grendel.

I picked up the Norton Critical Edition of the poem several months ago in Barnes and Noble on a fluke, really. I was searching for some Old English/Middle English study guides, and, upon finding nothing useful, I settled on Beowulf. I think what actually swayed me was the critical essay written by J.R.R. Tolkien reprinted in the back of the book.

Plus, I had a coupon.

In a discussion we had in British Literature this semester (spawned from our hatred of the Oprah Book Club, mind you), my friend Liz brought up the feeling you get when you discover a piece of literature on your own. It makes the piece more memorable, more enjoyable. Something about it just really pulls at your heartstrings, you know? No body forced me to pick Beowulf up again. But I'm glad I did, because I really missed a great deal.

Something I found really fascinating was how closely this epic followed the conventions for a Homeric Epic. For those who don't know, Homeric Epics follow these several formulaic conventions:
1) Opens by stating the theme of the epic
2) Invocation of the Muse
3) Opens "In medias res" (which is Latin for "in the middle of things")
4) Catalogs and genealogies are given
5) Main characters give extended formal speeches
6) The use of the epic simile (which is much more ornate than a regular simile)
7) The use of repetition and stock phrases
8) Intervention by supernatural forces
9) The hero is a figure of great national or cosmic importance, and usually have divine/superhuman abilities
10) The setting is vast in scope and generally spans many lands (sometimes even the Underworld, etc.)

As I read, I marked various points where I was consciously aware of specific conventions being deployed (of course, I noticed this halfway through, so I didn't mark every detail). The only convention I did not find was the invocation of the Muse. Actually, there wasn't much for "in medias res" either, but I think I may have a little textual evidence to support its existence. This is a topic I would like to do more research in...I'm curious to see which one influenced which [both were believed to be written down roughly the same time - between the 7th and 10th centuries - but both existed as separate oral traditions long before the earliest known written copies].

I also found a Creation Story within the larger scope of the epic, which I completely missed the first time I read it. It could have been easily missed too; it's only about three lines long. This Creation Story also included a flood, much like The Epic of Gilgamesh and the flood story found in the book of Genesis. It's a very interesting parallel.

And that, Dear Readers, is why I was destined to be an English major. Haha. I remember this one time in sixth or seventh grade...my English teacher at the time was on maternity leave, so the majority of the year we had a substitute. We were learning different genres of writing, and she thought it would be fun if we put on our own news broadcast. Everyone had to be interviewed on some topic of interest. Mostly everyone chose a sport [because my class had a great deal of basketball players and cheerleaders], some people talked about music...I talked about how I wanted to go to school to study and teach mythology. It was probably the most boring segment of the whole project [and I wasn't that liked in grade school to begin with], and I honestly forgot about the whole thing until today, but, again, I'm all for making parallels, and reading Beowulf helped me make that connection.

I think I want to go for my PhD.

Well, I have brownies in the oven, and some more reading to do. Forty-four novels aren't going to finish themselves! [Well, unless you're a Modernist text...then you're "self-contained" and can do whatever the fuck you want, hah]. G'night, Dear Readers.

Novel Number Five...

2007-05-17T23:02:00Z

...completed.

Finally finished Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal. I'm glad Bernie recommended this novel to be, because, to be honest, I may never have picked it up if he didn't rave about it in Creative Writing for a good fifteen minutes. The middle of the novel, when Joshua and Biff were training with the monks in China, was a bit slow, but over all it was a good read. Moore had a good-humored approach to a story that I think everyone has been beaten over the head with since an early age...I can see why some people may find it sacrilegious (or "satirical," as someone nicely tried to phrase it to me, heh), but, you know what? Fuck 'em. I liked having an animated, human Jesus, as opposed to droning Jesus we get in so many other versions.

I have three books lined up for my next reads:
1) The Dubliners by James Joyce
2) Fanny Hill, or Memoirs of a Woman of Pleasure by John Cleland
3) Beowulf: A Verse Translation by Seamus Heaney [love love love Seamus Heaney!]

Spring 2007 Grades

2007-05-16T01:55:20Z

Photography - 4.0
Creative Writing - 4.0
Survey of English Literature II/WSM - 4.0
Survey of American Literature I/WSM - 4.0
History of the English Language/WSM - 3.5
Projects in Writing (Manuscript) - 4.0

GPA for the semester - 3.90
Cumulative GPA - 3.85

Once again, Dr. Hamill is the only professor to not give me a 4.0. But I have another chance with him next semester in Comparative Grammar [masochistic, much?]. I worked my ass off, and now I'm looking forward to next semester. I'll have half my classes with Melissa, half my classes with Ginny...I'll even have Computer Graphics with Tim and Reed. Plus, I'll be living in the same apartment complex as everyone with the lovely Kristy, so I'm predicting a much better semester overall.

The obsessive compulsiveness in me wants to start preparing for next semester already. I'll only be taking three English courses, but it will still be a great deal of reading. I know I'll have at least three novels for Gothic Literature [with a possibly maximum of six], Dr. Hamill will have mostly technical text books, and who knows what Larry has in store for American Lit II. I also want to work on a proposal for Larry to add new courses to the curriculum (Post-colonial Studies II, Modern Horror, Studies in Tolkien, and the like).

But I'll take the rest of this week to at least enjoy my summer before getting down to some serious work.

In other news, I'm less than one-hundred pages away from finally finishing Lamb, and I finally found a copy of Fanny Hill, or Memoirs of a Woman of Pleasure. So, my fifty novels in a year goal is slowly plowing along. I have a little more than seven months to complete it. We'll see how it goes. The past couple weeks have been crazy with everything from funerals to finals, so I'm behind schedule.

I don't have anything else that I want to say. In fact, I didn't even want to write today. I haven't been in much of a writing mood, besides the little poem I wrote on Saturday night. Not a very good poem; one I have to tinker with to get how I like it, but I don't want to get into the slump that I did when I first went off to college.

Well, I think I'm going to finish watching Law and Order, then get back to reading. Maybe bed early tonight. Who knows.

vampireaurelia @ 2007-05-02T09:41:00

2007-05-02T14:27:43Z

I have so much work to get done, even though my classes ended yesterday, but I didn't to take a break and write something that wasn't academic. Writing is therapeutic for me, and, until Candy comes home and Matt gets his psychology degree, this is the closest thing I got. I acknowledge that the journalistic function of this devise ultimately fails, being that it is a display for public attention as opposed to private use, but I never take my hand written journals to school for the mere fact that I don't have many places to hide them here; they'd get lost in the fray of literary texts and notes, and I put too much damn heart and soul and blood into those for them to just be forgotten for a good portion of the year.

The end of the semester is always a stressful time. I always let little things bother me at this time. You know, those little things which I metaphorically "let go of" and chose to focus on something else. But the added stress of final papers and exams, plus a few other unneeded stresses...I don't know, I lose my shit quite easily. I tend to do so more privately than publicly. So I've been spending much of my time locked in my bedroom, or over at Kirby Hall, because those are places I can tolerate. I rant there alone, then carry on with my business. I just don't want to look at other people's messes, listening to empty words, and, ugh, don't want to go there. I even have my blue Christmas lights (or Zen lights, as I so affectionately dubbed them) plugged in today because I just need something to calm me the fuck down.

Don't let me lead you to believe, my dear Readers, that I'm always a grump. That I'm always angry. To certain people who receive the brunt of it (some deserve it, some don't), it may seem that way, but I implore you to think different. Yesterday, for example, I was quite sociable and, dare I say, happy with where I was in my life.

The Manuscript was unveiled yesterday, and it was a lovely ceremony. Practically the entire English department came for the event. My friend Chris won best prose, and Ginny's boyfriend won the best artistic piece. I was proud of them; they deserved it. The staff read their publications (mine was only an excerpt, since my short story was a little on the long side, and we needed to be done by 12:15). It was a nice reception, and I am looking forward to working on next semester's magazine.

Later in the day, the Humanities Department threw a picnic. Also a blast. Bernie brought his daughter, and I must say, she is the most adorable thing I have ever seen. She picked up the empty cookie containers, and was trying to drink the sprinkles. Bernie, in typical Bernie fashion was like, "*untranslatable noise* What are you doing?? You can't drink sprinkles! *untranslatable noise*" (Bernie communicates through untranslatable noises, facial expressions, and grunts). Dr. Hamill worked the grill, Burger King crown included. We even got an impromptu game of soccer started, and Dr. Anthony played on my team. It was, to say the least, amazing. I adore the English Department with all my heart. Those people are my family.

Afterward, Mollie, Ginny and I went to the Jazz Ensemble at the Darte to see Sam play. Every poster on campus said it began at 7:00, so we showed up at quarter to...and got kicked out because apparently, it started at 7:30 and we were disrupting the rehearsal. But eventually, it started...and it was all unorganized and ugh, the first half wasn't even listed in the program. Although, I do give those kids credit; they played well. I just wanted to smack the conductor.

Walking back home in a thunderstorm with Mollie was also quite fun, haha. Neither of us had umbrellas or hoodies, so we got completely drenched. We looked like drowned rats. It was so cold, but nice at the same time. You know what I mean? One of those empowering experiences where you feel more connected, more protected with everything and everyone. I almost didn't want to go inside when I reached the Y, because I don't think I was ready to face reality yet. I wanted to run in the streets, and jump in the puddles, and catch the raindrops on my tongue. I was nothing, yet I was everything. But it was cold and exhaustion which drove me inside.

Well, it looks like I procrastinated enough on these pending assignments. I have to get this portfolio done by 4:00, then Senior Capstones at 4:30, then Inkwell dinner. It's going to be another busy day.

Of six-legged, winged demons

2007-04-27T14:32:54Z

So this morning was unfolding much like it normally does on Friday. I wake up early, I shower, I throw my laundry into the wash...I had a conference with Dr. Hamill this morning, so instead of the normal "Friday sweatpants and over-sized t-shirt," I had to make myself look presentable.

So in this ritual of preening, I hear low, sporadic buzzing coming from behind me. At first I thought it was my laptop short circuiting; I normally don't shut it off when I go to bed at night, more of convenience the next day than anything, and I thought, "Oh great...it's not even a year old and it's already shittin' out on me." But lo and behold, I turn to assess the situation, and there are bees thrashing themselves into the ceiling light. Not just one bee...but several. I counted about five...there was one particularly fat one, about the width of my thumb, just hanging out on my pillow. Twitching it's antennae. Acting like it owns the place. What a creeper.

Needless to say, I bolted out of the bedroom and did my "I'm such a spaz-tard, I hate bees" freak out dance, whimpering like a puppy. I hate bees. Ever since that suicidal wasp attacked me at Cinemark a few years ago (I was just standing there! He was the aggressor!), and my entire forearm blew up like a balloon, I don't take my chances with any flying insect with a miniature sword sticking out its ass. I left my bedroom window open in the hopes that the six-legged demons find their way out before I have to gather my stuff for class at 1:00pm.

I didn't even get to finish getting ready for my conference with Dr. Hamill. My hair was tousled, I threw a leather jacket over the tank top I slept in...I looked like a wreck. He got a kick out of this story, however.

It's probably childish of me to be so terrified by such a tiny creature...and I recognize the irrationality of this moment...it's just...ugh...I HATE bees.

Motherfucker.

Ode to the Masochistic English Major

2007-04-24T02:26:59Z

O, Masochistic English Major
Who luxuriates in subtexts eating at thy soul
And ragged paper edges tearing at thy flesh
Make haste! young English Major
And delve into the world of literary complexities
And textual analyses
Awaken thy senses to annihilate thy classical traditions
Ripping thou’s love child from the loins of academia
And dissecting its context like a gutted fish
Invoke thy masters – Shakespeare, Chaucer, Byron, Poe –
To jostle thy cognitions
To recite complex dictions
For that is thou’s undulation

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

I normally don't post creative writings in this journal (that's why I have a writing journal), but I was proud of this puppy. And yes, the last line is "That's how we roll" in higher diction. Because I can.

Much thanks to Melissa, who played a major role in the development and editing process of this poem ;]

Novel Number Five...

2007-04-16T04:24:27Z

...completed. Charlotte: A Tale of Truth [later published as Charlotte Temple] by Susanna Rowson. I admitt, it was a slow read, and I really didn't get into the novel until about half way through...but I was in tears at the end. Poor Charlotte.

I entreated to go to bed much earlier, since I had been up since four this morning, running on less than three hours sleep [kept having horrible nightmares...spent most of the night staring at the ceiling], but I was so engrossed with the second half of this novel, that I committed myself to finishing it tonight. Tomorrow, I begin work on finishing Lamb, I swear.

Novel Number 4

2007-04-13T03:24:06Z

Completed. Finished The Guide last night [or, if you want to get technical, one o'clock this morning after a stressful night of photography]. Throughly loved it. Raju came through for me. I kind of knew he would, either from being way too optimistic, or just general prediction from reading so many types of novels in the past. But, anyway, I will not go into details about the novel, because I feel everyone should read it and take something from it [not necessarily what I got from it, but everyone has a different perspective]. Just read it. You'll like it, trust me.

Now I am once again attempting to finish Lamb while dually working on another novel for American Literature [Charlotte: A Tale of Truth]. Should be interesting. Charlotte is short though [roughly sixty-some pages with the size of the print], so that'll probably get done first.

I also have to start preparing a shit load of papers, one being the daunting word etymology paper. I decided to do the word "punk" for my topic [because I figured at least one other person would do the word "fuck," and I wanted to be slightly more original]. The thing that makes this paper more slightly more thought provoking is that is can't be a simple recounting of the word's origin, but rather, I have to make some kind of a claim about the word, and discuss what lingusitically about the words makes one definition more sustainable than others. I think I'm going to argue that from it's origins, punk describe something pertaining to rebellion...and somehow tie it in with it's link to the word "puncture" and its implications of violence make it ideal for such a meaning. I don't know. I'm just pulling this all out of my ass.

But I have been going since very early this morning [fuck you, photography!], so instead of doing more work tonight, I'm going to vegg-out with some Mario Kart. Tomorrow is the Stitch-A-Thon! Yayayay!

G'night, my lovlies! ;*

vampireaurelia @ 2007-04-09T20:08:00

2007-04-10T01:54:20Z

I really needed Easter Break this week. I didn't get nearly as much accomplished work wise as I originally plotted out, but it was a welcomed breath of fresh air. Sometimes I think, or rather, I know I put too much stress on myself to pack so many things into a tiny time frame when I know realistically it's impossible for me to do everything...but, damnit, I try. I really do try.

I was most excited about seeing my Lovie after a month of school. I barely saw him at all during spring break. I didn't see him as much as I would have liked this break either [because of how short it was...I saw him every day but Saturday, and even went to pick him up on Thursday], but I reiterate time and time again...it absolutely sucks only getting to see him in spurts. I'll probably be super miserable for the next couple days until I readjust to existing on my own. It's not something I necessarily look forward to, but something I've just learned to accept.

I didn't get to finish reading Lamb like I wanted. But it wasn't such a big loss. I started reading The Guide by R.K. Narayan for my British Literature class [even though it isn't technically British; it's Indian]. The main character, Raju, reminds me so much of someone with whom I used to be friends oh so long ago. I mean, to the tee. Perhaps not in physical description, but in their ideals and thought patterns, they're twins. I even wrote his name in the margin of the page, because that was the only way I could put Raju's character into words. It was creepy. I plan on finishing the novel before I go to bed tonight [I only have roughly one hundred pages left, so it's plausible], and I'm just hoping that things fair better for Raju than they do for my old, stubborn, ex-friend.

But right now I should be getting back to work. Organizing things and working on all the assignments I didn't get to over break, like inking the second page of the comic for Comic Book Club [for which the deadline is steadily approaching], my Query Paper for Thursday [because I like getting those out of the way], and possibly processing some film for my assignment due Thursday [which I know is not happening tonight, but in a perfect world, I'd be done with that right now and planning out the final project].

I'm hopeful.

On Reading

2007-04-04T13:33:46Z

I'm setting a challenge for myself. By the end of the year, I want to have read at least fifty novels. With how crazy college gets, I never get the time to read for pleasure. And I find that when I don't get to do something for myself once in a while, and all the work piles up, I go crazy. But this will be beneficial to me over the summer; I'll be working full time at the bakery, so I'll need something to do while I'm on break. I'll be trading a few shifts with Sierra to cover a few days I need to take off for weddings, graduations and my Sigma Tau Delta induction that's coming up at the end of the month, and there's always free time to read on that shift. Plus, I don't watch much television, so this will help prevent me from sitting at the computer all day whining that there's nothing to do while Dan takes summer classes [at Wilkes, I believe, which is awesome if it works out like that].

I already have a few started, but this is the crazy part of the semester, so I don't expect to get another large influx of books read until after finals end on May 9th [I think it's May 9th? I've been here for two years, and still can't figure out how to read the damned finals schedule]. I have papers out the wazoo due in the next two to three weeks: a 6-7 page etymology report, a 12-14 page research paper for [both of those for History of the English Language], a 10-12 page research paper for British Literature, and a [I think] 5-7 page research paper for American Literature. I will be a slave to the library the next couple weeks.

But anyway, I've only read three books I've read thus far:

1) The Elephant Prince - I don't have the author's name right now, but it's about the Hindu god Ganesh.
2) Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen - Mr. Darcy is my new literary crush, I swear.
3) The Lost World - Michael Crichton - Oh Ian Malcom <3

I'm not sure if you can count The Norton Anthology of American Literature Volumes A & B or The Norton Anthology of English Literature, because even though I've read extensive amounts of each book, I haven't read both cover to cover. I'm halfway through Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal by Michael Moore [recommended by the notorious Bernie Kovacs], and plan on finishing it over Easter Break. My next project after that will be, I think, Dubliners by James Joyce. Plus I have my expansive collection of Stephen King novels to get through [my life goal...I have so many of them, I don't think I could possibly read them all!].

But for right now, since I have nothing else to mindlessly ramble about, I think I'm going to do some laundry, clean up the apartment a bit, and get some work done before going to lunch with Kenny G. My goal is to get all reading assignments done before break starts so I can concentrate on just the writing aspect. When I save it all for break, one or the other gets neglected.

One more day until my Candy comes home. Le sigh.

vampireaurelia @ 2007-04-02T11:01:00

2007-04-02T15:01:52Z

The fact that I just used the phrase "pussy-whipped" in an academic paper makes me giggle. I love History of the English Language, haha.

Random things I meant to post a while ago, but never got around to it

2007-03-27T05:24:34Z

In no particular order:

So, I am twenty. The big 2-0. Honestly feels no different than nineteen or previous teenage years. My only claim to fame from turning twenty is that I can officially not be involved in petty teenaged bullshit drama.

The day itself wasn't bad. I went out with a few close friend to Katana, then we just hung out for about two hours afterwards. It would have been complete if Candy could have come in, but at least he'll be home for Easter.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

I registered for my classes next semester:
- Gothic Novel Seminar
- Comparative Grammar
- Survey of American Literature II
- Computer Graphics
- Painting
- Inkwell and Manuscript will count for one credit each

Plus, no classes on Fridays. Having only one class on Mondays and Fridays was nice, but I need a full day off where I'm not working at the bakery to fully concentrate on just homework. It was too much this semester, and I'm worn down.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Work wasn't too stressful this weekend, as it has been the last several weeks. I got to work with Sierra again. Everything ran smoothly. I didn't have to go in fifteen minutes early to get things done on time. It was nice not having to kill myself for a change. I miss her on my shift; I want her back.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

I finally got this photography thing down. I am in and out of the processing room in a half hour. I can make one print roughly every 20-30 minutes. Quality is decent. I'm even ahead with the assignments by a week [and hopefully after tomorrow, I'll be two weeks ahead]. It's an expensive, time consuming class, but I'm starting to enjoy it now.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

I want to write more in-depth about certain issues, but I'm feeling blocked tonight. Bernie always says you should write even if you don't feel like it or even if what you write ends up being total crap. This whole entry is total crap, but goes along with the mood I've been in the past few days - completely disjointed and incoherent. But when I finally get in the mood to say what's really on my mind, the feeling will pass. It always passes.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Time for bed. Sleep makes everything better.